Court Stupidity

These were actually taken from real court transcripts...

Q. What is your date of birth?
A. July fifteenth.
Q. What year?
A. Every year.

 

Q. What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
A. Gucci sweats and Reeboks.

 

Q. This myasthenia gravis, does it affect your memory at all?
A. Yes.
Q. And in what ways does it affect your memory?
A. I forget.
Q. You forget. Can you give us an example of something that you've forgotten?

 

Q. How old is your son, the one living with you?
A. Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can't remember which.
Q. How long has he lived with you?
A. Forty-five years.

 

Q. What was the first thing your husband said to you when he woke that morning?
A. He said, "Where am I, Cathy?"
Q. And why did that upset you?
A. My name is Susan.

 

Q. And where was the location of the accident?
A. Approximately milepost 499.
Q. And where is milepost 499?
A. Probably between milepost 498 and 500.
Q. Sir, what is your IQ?
A. Well, I can see pretty well, I think.

 

Q. Did you blow your horn or anything?
A. After the accident?
Q. Before the accident.
A. Sure, I played for ten years. I even went to school for it.

 

Q. Do you know if your daughter has ever been involved in voodoo or the occult?
A. We both do.
Q. Voodoo?
A. We do.
Q. You do?
A. Yes, voodoo.

 

Q. Trooper, when you stopped the defendant, were your red and blue lights flashing?
A. Yes.
Q. Did the defendant say anything when she got out of her car?
A. Yes, sir.
Q. What did she say?
A. What disco am I at?

 

Q. Now doctor, isn't it true that when a person dies in his sleep, he doesn't know about it until the next morning?

 

Q. The youngest son, the twenty-year old, how old is he?

 

Today's Reflection:

Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person who drives a race car not called a racist?

 

 

Live Long and Prosper...