I will go in, sit in a waiting room with 15 other people (some
of whom will be exhibiting signs of illness which make you want to wear a mask
over your nose and mouth and wait outside) for 45 minutes or so. I will then be
taken to a hallway chair where a nurse will weight me, check my blood pressure,
irritate me by asking my date of birth and reminding me of how old I really am,
ask me if I am in any pain (I always say yes and ask for morphine –it hasn’t worked
yet but I try anyway) and finally escort me into a tiny “examining room” where I
am left to wait for another 30 minutes with nothing to do but read one of the
dog eared “Ladies Daily Journals” published in 2008.
My doctor will eventually knock on the door and ask to come
in (I’m always tempted to say no just to see what would happen), we will then
discuss the results of my most resent blood tests (have you ever noticed how;
as you get older, doctors seem to relish ordering tests that involve somebody
sticking a hole in you with a large needle?). We will then talk about a good
television program or football game and within 15 minutes I’m sent on my way. They
then send a bill to the insurance company for $225 for an office visit and
schedule me for another routine visit in 6 months when the whole thing starts
again.
Multiply that experience by the number of doctors I get to
see as I get older (nephrologists, oncologists, surgeons, cardiologists, etc…ad
infinitum) and you get a pretty good idea how I get to spend a lot of my time
as I start my ‘golden years’. It also
explains one of the reasons our health care costs in this country have gotten
out of control. 15 minute Office visit: $225 dollars, Lab tests: $175 dollars –and
that’s for the “routine” visits.
Well, overall I guess I cannot complain too much. Seeing
doctors more often is just one of the prices of getting older, and, as they
say, it’s better than the alternative. So today I’ll content myself with
watching the expressions of the faces of the other patients when the nurse calls
my name and I walk through the door dragging one foot behind and doing my
imitation of Quasimodo.
Ya’ll have a great day….
Live Long and Prosper...
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