There has been a lot going on in the world these past few weeks and, as you might guess, I have been busting to get my 2 cents worth in. I mean come on, Kim-Jong Il dies and I can't get on the internet? Not to mention the Republican primaries, Eric Holders antics, Chinese hacking, Grobachev calling for Putins resignation and mass protests in Russia, the Iranians getting one of our most advanced drones..... There were so many good things to comment on, or make fun of, or warn about.... I really thought some mornings I was going to have a siezure.... One time I even tried to write a blog using my smartphone. That was a nightmare -lets just say that is not something you should try at home without supervision.
Well, the good news (depending entirely on your point of view) is that I am now back and ready to rumble (or is that ramble?). I hope to get back on a daily schedule of rumbling by tomorrow. So, if you are a loyal follower of these writing misadventures, I suggest lots of coffee (fortified with Irish Whiskey works best for me). Oh, and before I forget, thank you very kindly to all of you who wrote to say you missed the daily doses of insanity, I do appreciate the fact that you are willing to expose yourselves to my humble muttering so often.
I guess the best place to get started is to talk about Christmas a little. I love Christmas. To me it is a special time of the year when you feel a little closer to your family and true friends and a little more kindly towards strangers -that is until they get in front of you at the check-out counter.....Yes, Christmas, when they start playing those wonderful traditional Christmas songs like White Christmas (I wonder why the NAACP has not declared that racist yet?). Yes, every year they start playing them a little earlier (I heard my first one the day after Halloween). And they play them more often (several radio stations started playing them continually, 24/7, right after Thanksgiving). Every year I listen to the music, get a little misty-eyed and cheerful -and then watch my brain turn to butter hearing Jingle Bells over and over and over. Do you think Christmas music could acutally be some form of devious Oriental tourture? This year I found myself so fed up with "I saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus" that the next idiot to pass humming it would see me risk following Scrooges advice -I considered grabbing the person, boiling them in thier own pudding and burying them with a stake of holly through their heart..... Yes, "Hooray" turns to "Humbug" around the 300th playing of Silent Night....
And Christmas decorations -gee I love Christmas decorations. Of course those get a little carried away too. They can make the homes along the street look so beautiful and cheerful at night -that is, until some neighbor wants to show off turns the block into something that looks like a carnival at the board walk. There are so many lights on some homes the residents start suffering from sleep apnia because its too bright at night to go to sleep. Your body starts thinking you have a bad case of jet lag.....Personaly, I put up a small number of very pretty decorations. For example, I have a very small Christmas tree with one string of lights. It takes me 5 minutes to take it out, set it up and turn it on -a very nice change from the days when my Mom used to have me digging through the garage to get out 4000 boxes of Christmas decorations and spend entire weekends setting things up, runniing strings of lights, tracking down and replacing burned out bulbs and hanging decorations (she always wanted one hung 1 foot higher than I could reach on that rickety ladder).
And then there are all those presents at Christmas time. I love Christmas presents. What a wonderful tradition (by-the-way, I don't know who first said "It is better to give then receive? I am sure that got reversed in translation). A time to show your family and friends how much you care. Wow, what hypocrisy. If you really wanted to show how you felt about most of them you'd be buying a lot more coal and a lot fewer fruit cakes. When did exchanging presents become so important? It's nice and all that, but when did it become mandatory? After all, it's Jesus's birthday after all, not ours. What happened to getting him a present? When did we start feeling we had to buy something for cousin Erin (whom you have not seen in 5 years)? Is a present a way of soothing our conscience for being mean to people the rest of the year? I hope not, I don't have enough money to buy my way out of that.....
Well, all-in-all, Christmas is a wonderful and happy time of the year. I hope you all had a great and special one. As for me, I always look forward to it, and just like the old friend that shows up and stays too long, I am glad to see it go. I'll be ready for it again -as long as I know it'll be at least a year
Now it's time to get ready for New Years Eve.....which reminds me, I need to get to Booze-R-Us today or tomorrow.... Have a nice day and....
Live Long and Prosper....
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