Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Still more from the “Incredibly Stupid” Files

Smart Hacker, well, maybe not too smart…. 

The NASA space agency reported an intruder on its Ames Research Center website, emanating from a site in Brazil manned by someone perturbed by the U.S.'s eavesdropping. "Stop spy on us!" and "Obama heartless! Inhumane!" were just two of the messages on the 14 NASA sites taken down temporarily. –They think that the hacker intended to target the National Security Agency -- NSA -- instead of NASA. 

Smart car thief, well, maybe not too smart…. 

Tony Taylor was arrested in Chicago after driving off with a woman's SUV by convincing her he was a valet parking agent and handing her a claim check. He was detained shortly afterward at a nearby Nordstrom only because he tried to get cash refunds for items that had been in the woman's back seat. 

Something new to smoke… 

A woman notified police in Fremont, California, that a thief had rummaged through her vehicle at night but had taken only a low-end gift-shop item -- leaving behind a checkbook, some money and an expensive pillow. The item, she said, perhaps looked like a small bag of marijuana, but in reality was a novelty-store bag of dried elephant dung. "It's a great gag gift," she said. (I'm sure the thief was amused)

Now here’s a new excuse… 

A 61-year-old Texas man admitted to a hospital not long ago appearing to be falling-down-drunk, even though denying having had even a single drink, was discovered to be unintentionally manufacturing beer in his stomach. With "auto-brewery syndrome," stomach-based yeast automatically ferments all starches (even vegetables or grains) passing through, converting them into ethanol. Normally, natural stomach bacteria control the yeast, but if, for example, antibiotics had inadvertently eliminated the bacteria, the yeast would prevail and the alchohol would be produced. (I wonder if I could get some antibiotics for that scratch on my arm,,,,

What makes you think the government spends too much? 

While Congress struggled recently to pass a budget or an increase to the national debt limit, one program made it through rather easily: farm subsidies for inactive "farmers." The subsidies were renewed, based on a 2008 law, virtually assuring that more than 18,000 in-name-only farmers (who received $24 million last year) will not be cut off. Included, according to a 2012 Government Accountability Office report, were recipients at 2,300 "farms" that had not grown a single crop in five years (including 622 without a crop in 10 years). 

Yep, they’re all true (although I kinda wish they weren’t).

Today’s Reflection: 
The Purpose of a childs middle name is so he can tell when he’s in real trouble…

Live Long and Prosper…

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