Monday, September 14, 2015

I Hate Broccoli

Well, like the first President Bush, I hate Broccoli and no one is going to make me eat it anymore. I saw these Broccoli Jokes and thought they were kinda funny...
 
What do you get when you cross broccoli and a vampire? Count Broccula! 
 
What do you know when people start calling you broccoli? Your having a bad hair day. 
 
What do you get when you cross a melon with broccoli? A melon-coli snack. 
 
What kind of socks do you need to plant broccoli? Garden hose! 
 
What's the difference between broccoli and snot? Kids dont eat broccoli. 
 
What do you call a scary movie about vegetables? The Broccoli Horror Picture Show. 
 
Where did the broccoli go to have a few drinks? The Salad Bar! 
 
Broccoli might get stuck in your teeth, but French Fries get stuck on your ass. 
 
Broccoli: I look like a tree. 
Walnut: I look like a brain. 
Mushroom: I look like an umbrella. 
Banana: Dude! Change the topic. 
 
Two broccoli stems One day two broccoli stems, who were best friends, were walking together down the street. They stepped off the curb and a speeding car came around the corner and ran one of them over. 
 
The uninjured broccoli stem called 911 and helped his injured friend as best he was able. 
 
The injured broccoli stem was taken to emergency at the hospital and rushed into surgery. After a long and agonizing wait, the doctor finally appeared. He told the uninjured broccoli stem, 
 
"I have good news, and I have bad news. The good news is that your friend is going to pull through." 
 
"The bad news is that he's going to be a vegetable for the rest of his life" 
 
I'd admit these might be a littke corny, but you might think I was making a bad pun...
 
Have a great day in spite of these jokes.
 
 
 
 
Today's Reflection:
The moment I saw your book and picked it up I was convulsed with laughter. Someday I intend to read it...
-Grocho Marx
 
Live Long and Prosper....

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