America is a country where people spend half of their money on food, and the other half on losing weight.
I'd rather look back at my life and say "I can't believe I did that" instead of saying, "I wish I did that."
I just read last year 4,153,237 people got married. I may be wrong, but shouldn't that be an even number?
The Nobel Peace Prize medal depicts three naked men with their hands on each others shoulders! Makes you wonder….
Tablecloths were originally meant to be served as towels with which dinner guests could wipe their hands and faces after eating! I guess my crazy Uncle who used to tuck the edge of the table cloth under his chin wasn’t so crazy after all…
A Psychiatrist once asked me if a glass was half empty or half full. I told him it was full –one half with water and the other half with air. He’s still mumbling to himself….
Every second, Americans collectively eat one hundred pounds of chocolate. If that’s true, where can I find these people, I want to join…
Men are 6 times more likely to be struck by lightning than women! No, Margaret, I’m not saying a word…
And here are some things our better lawmakers have produced:
It is against the law to mispronounce the name of the State of Arkansas in that State.
In Tennessee, it is against the law to drive a car while sleeping.
In New York, it is against the law for a blind person to drive an automobile.
In Kentucky, it's the law that a person must take a bath once a year.
In Tennessee, a law exists which prohibits the sale of bologna (sandwich meat) on Sunday.
Live Long and Prosper....