Better than a Nursing Home

When I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a Princess Cruise Ship. The average cost for a nursing home is $200 per day. Reservations on a Princess, with a long-term discount and senior discount cost just $135 per day. That leaves $65 a day for:

1. Gratuities, which will only be $10 per day.

2. I can eat as many as 10 meals a day or I can have room service (which means I can have breakfast-in-bed every day of the week).

3. Princess ships have as many as three swimming pools, a workout room, free washers and dryers, and shows every night.

4. They have free toothpaste, razors, soap, and shampoo.

5. They will treat you like a customer, not a patient. An extra $5 worth of tips will have the entire staff scrambling to help you.

6. I will get to meet new people every 7 or 14 days.

7. T.V. Broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to have the mattress replaced? No Problem! They will fix everything and apologize for your inconvenience.

8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't even have to ask for them.

9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip you are on Medicare; if you fall and break a hip on the Princess ship they will upgrade you to a suite for the rest of your life.

10. You can see South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia, New Zealand, Asia, or just about anywhere else you want to go.

PS. When you die, they just dump you over the side -- at no charge. 

Today's Reflection:
Karate is a form of martial arts in which people who have had
years and years of training can, using only their hands and feet, make some of the worst movies in the history of the world.

Live Long and Prosper...